Maybe it's just because it's Lent or perhaps I'm getting morose as I age, but I've been thinking about last words. What do you say at the end ... of a friendship? of a marriage? of a life?
We lost a young woman in our congregation in January. She took her own life. Her last words were in a text message ... sent to me. She promised me that if she was going to take her life, she would contact me. She did so in a way that made sure I wouldn't be able to intervene. She apologized for doing what she was about to do.
Last words have the power to bless or to break and we never know when those last words will come ... and whether they will be the words of another to us or our own to another.
Monday, March 11, 2013
Friday, November 23, 2012
“deeply saddened” - reflections on CoE's General Synod
A sister of mine in Christ, Katielou+, from across the Pond reflects on the General Synod's vote on women bishops:
“deeply saddened”
Her words below struck a deep chord in me (emphasis mine):
I am blessed that most of the people with whom I serve do not question the validity of my orders; however, I still find myself encountering people who reject my call because of my gender. While the former outnumber the latter, I still endure the occasional mildly condescending lecture on a "complimentary scriptural" hermeneutic (i.e. men and women are created by God to be "complimentary" which espouses male "headship" and "authority" over women - others will know this as patriarchy).
I pray for one day when we can affirm the Holy Spirit's work within all of us regardless of gender, sexual orientation, hue of skin, age, appearance, or any other division with which humans can become fixated for the purposes of gaining privilege at the expense of the other.
“deeply saddened”
Her words below struck a deep chord in me (emphasis mine):
It hurts, not because I want to be a bishop. It hurts because to some this whole thing was not about bishops, not about the quality of the legislation. This is about the validity of women’s orders in of themselves. This is about if I am a fraud when I get up and put my collar on, rather than being truly in holy orders and sent out to work for the kingdom. It hurts because while some people think differently to me, and I try my hardest to respect that they feel differently, they don’t all pay that respect back. Even if I struggle to respect how your reading of scripture and tradition differs from mine, I don’t ever question your fundamental personhood in your vocation. By doubting my capacity for priesthood, you are denying my integrity before God, denying my very identity. Is that really your right to judge? Did the church not spend a load of time in church history lectures worrying about the validity/efficacy of the sacraments regardless of the person of the minister?
I am blessed that most of the people with whom I serve do not question the validity of my orders; however, I still find myself encountering people who reject my call because of my gender. While the former outnumber the latter, I still endure the occasional mildly condescending lecture on a "complimentary scriptural" hermeneutic (i.e. men and women are created by God to be "complimentary" which espouses male "headship" and "authority" over women - others will know this as patriarchy).
I pray for one day when we can affirm the Holy Spirit's work within all of us regardless of gender, sexual orientation, hue of skin, age, appearance, or any other division with which humans can become fixated for the purposes of gaining privilege at the expense of the other.
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Something worse than death ...
I had one of those random thoughts yesterday (remember, this blog is about random musings, right?). It came as a question: "What is a fate worse than death?" "A fate worse than death" is admittedly a cliche phrase, but when the question popped into my head while I was driving home from church, the answer appeared quite suddenly: "Yes ... not living."
The fate worse than death is not living. Not being fully alive while you are living is a fate worse than death. We're often held hostage to the things we fear in our lives. We are afraid: afraid of losing our jobs, losing our health, losing our loved ones, losing our security, losing control, losing our independence, losing our life. We are afraid of losing so many things that we are bound up in fear and held hostage to it. So we play it safe and think nothing bad will happen if we just color inside the lines and follow the rules ... and we stop living and merely exist.
News flash ... coloring inside and following the rules doesn't protect you from loss. You can lose it all in a moment. We received news this evening of a woman who, after giving birth to her third child last week, suffered a massive stroke. She is on life support and the bleeding in her brain has not stopped. Her husband is numb - it wasn't supposed to be like this. Where is God in this?
Admittedly, these things shake me to the core. They are reminders that nothing is truly safe in this life - at least not by the safety standards we humans envision. Our safety rests in God alone and not living fully when life is so fleeting isn't a faithful option.
The fate worse than death is not living. Not being fully alive while you are living is a fate worse than death. We're often held hostage to the things we fear in our lives. We are afraid: afraid of losing our jobs, losing our health, losing our loved ones, losing our security, losing control, losing our independence, losing our life. We are afraid of losing so many things that we are bound up in fear and held hostage to it. So we play it safe and think nothing bad will happen if we just color inside the lines and follow the rules ... and we stop living and merely exist.
News flash ... coloring inside and following the rules doesn't protect you from loss. You can lose it all in a moment. We received news this evening of a woman who, after giving birth to her third child last week, suffered a massive stroke. She is on life support and the bleeding in her brain has not stopped. Her husband is numb - it wasn't supposed to be like this. Where is God in this?
Admittedly, these things shake me to the core. They are reminders that nothing is truly safe in this life - at least not by the safety standards we humans envision. Our safety rests in God alone and not living fully when life is so fleeting isn't a faithful option.
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