Of ultimate importance ... part 2

This question of ultimate importance hit home for us in the last 72 hours. For those of you who know I serve in the Episcopal Diocese of Maryland, you may have heard about the tragic shooting which occurred in one of our parishes last Thursday. If not, you can read about it here.

I heard about this just before the opening of our diocesan convention. My oldest daughter, who served as youth delegate from our county, was out picking up breakfast for us when I heard the news. I was glad I had the chance to talk with her when she returned to our hotel room and break the news to her before convention opened.

When convention opened and the news was announced that the parish administrator and co-rector had both been shot, we were stunned. Brenda Brewington, parish administrator, was pronounced dead at the scene. Co-rector Mary-Marguerite Kohn+ was flown to Baltimore Shock Trauma and kept alive on life support so that organ donations could be arranged. Douglas Jones, the homeless man who perpetrated this act of violence, was found dead in the woods near the church of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

This was the first time my daughter had confronted a senseless, violent death. Given that a priest was dead, and her mom is a priest, this was hard to process and understand. She was very teary at the opening of convention. But we gathered together and other people at our table offered her comfort and consolation. She had a safe place to process this horrible news. And she was surrounded by people of faith who showed her how Christians cope with tragedy:

• We cried together and had conversation
• We offered forgiveness to the gunman
• We prayed the litany at the time of death for Mary-Marguerite+
• We offered Eucharist in thanksgiving for all who minister in Christ's name
• Two parishes offered their churches to the family of the gunman for his funeral
• We recommitted ourselves to helping the most vulnerable in our communities

So where did my daughter learn to cope with senseless tragedy? Where did she hear about the injustice of a society where the mentally ill have less access to treatment than they do to guns? Where did she hear about people recommitting themselves to serve Christ? Where did she hear an affirmation of life? She heard this surrounded by her Church. She didn't learn this on the playing field.

Enough said.

Nineveh

I can relate to Jonah. I don't think I'm as cranky as he was (Beloved Husband might disagree), but I do understand his reaction when he was told to go to Nineveh. "I don't want to go to Nineveh! Hmmm ... Tarshish is nice this time of year."

Everybody has a "Nineveh." For a long time, becoming a priest was my "Nineveh." I had a lot of great excuses, but God kept coming back when I least expected it and stayed on me about it until I gave in. Fortunately, no big fish were involved, but it was my "Nineveh" nonetheless.

A big part of it was fear of the kinds of things priests have to face. The thing that scared me most was being with someone facing a tragedy like a sudden death, death of a child or a terminal diagnosis. Once I was ordained, I knew at some point I'd have to face this. Clinical pastoral education helped me face some of this and learn how to cope, but you never master it.

Last week, I had to go to "Nineveh" with the folks at Calvary United Methodist Church. On Monday, we had a huge 50 car accident on South Mountain just west of our house. Two people were killed - one was a prominent member of Calvary. Lori Shipley had been the church council president, sang in the Gospel Choir, taught the middle school youth ... she and her husband been involved in everything. The next morning, retired Judge Herbert Rollins died after battling cancer. Two huge funerals back to back on Friday and Saturday. Later that week, we had another member die ... she'll be buried on Monday afternoon. In addition, two other Calvary members lost close family members last week.

Nobody wants to go to their personal "Nineveh" - whatever it is. But I've learned from Jonah and last week that God gives us what we need to get in and out of our "Ninevehs" alive. Jonah had good reason to fear going into that great city ... the people had a violent reputation and he was bearing some bad news from God. I know I haven't mastered this whole pastor thing in times of crisis ... but God will make sure I get out of it alive.